Tuesday, October 28, 2008

My Mind and Homeschooling to Create Adults

I'm very tired and want to go to bed but wanted to share a few thoughts with you before I "sign off" for the night.

The biggest thing on my mind tonight is the weather. It's snowing and sticking. Josh went to Gaylord to get a couple of errands done and then to hang out with friends. He came back after a couple of hours because the roads were getting really bad. He said slush was piling up on the roadways and that he couldn't see much in front of him because of the snow coming down. Here's what I think: It's only October! What do we have in store for the rest of the winter? Ugh.

I received a No Greater Joy magazine today and read parts of it. One thing that sticks out in my mind is the article concerning the Vision Forum lifestyle - one that apparently teaches that children must remain in the home under total submission to the parents until they (the children) are married. According to the article I read, homeschooled children raised in these families are growing up totally dependent upon their parents. The really smart ones rebel.

Aren't we supposed to be raising our kids to be adults rather than little frightened clones of ourselves? As a homeschool parent, I can say that not all of us ascribe to the belief that children have to be robots that are turned on and turned off by the mom and dad. My oldest son is in college studying criminal justice and works a part-time job. He's VERY outgoing and is in no way the stereotypical "backward" homeschooled boy. The other kids are following quite well in that respect except for one son who we are diligently prodding and teaching to make decisions on his own, etc.

I guess the point of this little bit is that I really want my kids to be on their own. I want to raise adults, not perpetual children who never grow up. I love my kids, but I don't want them to live with me forever. I'm counting the days until Josh moves out (sorry Josh, couldn't help it.) I can't imagine never having that retirement time alone with my husband. And the children don't want to be babied all of their lives either.

If you're not sure how to raise healthy adults, get into the Bible. It's all laid out for you there. Nowhere does it tell parents to keep their children immature and dependent upon you. They're to depend on God. After all, He's the one who'll be there leading them when you're dead and gone.

I think I'd like to interview homeschooled kids (and maybe those who are more traditionally schooled) and learn more about those who find themselves in this sort of oppressive environment where Mom and Dad rule forever and damn their kids if they dare to leave them. I'd like to write a series of articles or a book about this - really. People need to know the truth of the Bible and not the teachings of man.


FromThe Creek said...

Looks like we visited at the right time huh?!?

That is why I discontinued my free subscription to that magazine! It was driving me nuts every time it would come in the mail.

I believe, like you, that we should raise our children to adulthood. I would hate to look at my son-in-law or daughter-in-law one day and say ok take over the babysitting now. Unfortunately, this is all too common...even in homes where the kids are public schooled...parents want to do everything for their kids instead of teaching them how to do it themselves. This is a huge injustice to those kids though because the parents will not always be there to "do it for them". I have one friend that never pumped gas until we were in college!

So there is a fine line that we as parents should be aware of. Help our children when they need it...but teach them to understand the difference between when they actually need it and when they just don't want to do it themselves.

Rita T. said...

Christy already knows this, but to those of you who haven't read the article in No Greater Joy, Michael Pearl isn't condoning the Vision Forum ideology. His article was actually quite informative and disturbing at the same time. You can read it online at http://www.nogreaterjoy.org/